


Tales from Hell: The Bassmaster

by DK_Eldritch



Series: Tales from Hell: Hazbin Hotel [3]
Category: Hazbin Hotel (Web Series)
Genre: Alastor Being a Jerk (Hazbin Hotel), Angel Dust-Typical Sexual Content (Hazbin Hotel), Asexual Alastor (Hazbin Hotel), Bass - Freeform, Battle of the Bands, CAN YOU FEEL THAT BASS, Canon-Typical Behavior, Canon-Typical Violence, Cockblocking, Demons, Drug Addiction, Drug Use, Drugged Sex, Electrocution, F/F, F/M, Hell, House Party, Hypnotism, I'm Going to Hell, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Jealousy, Limousines, Long-Term Relationship(s), M/M, Musicals, Nudity, Pigs, Pornstars, Public Sex, Singing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-06
Updated: 2019-12-06
Packaged: 2021-02-27 00:47:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 9
Words: 9,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21688639
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DK_Eldritch/pseuds/DK_Eldritch
Summary: Angel Dust is getting soft. At least, according to everyone around him.Ordered by his boss Valentino, Angel and his rival Synthia are tasked with reassembling an EDM demon by the name of Bassmaster in order to recruit him to the porn studio. However, when he reborn, the demon demands a spot to reintroduce himself to Pentagram City, and that place turns out to be the Happy Hotel. As the party of a lifetime takes hold over the old hotel, will Angel maintain his old hedonistic lifestyle or will he protect his friends and his new home?Meanwhile, Charlie and Vaggie finally have a date at the theater, but Alastor is running on his own rules. Is he a dick? Of course he is, but can Charlie and Vaggie trust him?
Relationships: Angel Dust/Cherri Bomb (Hazbin Hotel)/Original Female Character(s), Charlie Magne/Vaggie
Series: Tales from Hell: Hazbin Hotel [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1550146
Comments: 1
Kudos: 41





	1. The Daily Life of Angel Dust

**Author's Note:**

> Sex and nudity are over this thing but nothing explicit is being written in to try to keep it at mature/lighthearted. I can probably do more explicit stuff if requested but I'm not focusing on it.
> 
> This Episode clocked in 3k higher than I expected it to. A lot of extra detail was added in during the editing. The next episode won't be as long.

Episode 3:

“Alright cut! That’s a wrap!” said the director, and the sigh of relief across the set was immeasurable. The lights cut off, towels were thrown and Angel Dust stretched out after such a long session. He grabbed a shake mid-flight and slurped it up.

“Alright show’s over,” he said, caressing the straw. “You all did great. I am exhausted!  
Get the hell outta my face. Brucie you can drop by this studio anytime.” He blew the demon a kiss. “Carrie, where the fuck is my towel?” As soon as he said it the towel was on his face. “Awww yeah. This is the life.”

Angel strolled his way through the XXX Porno Studios warehouse like he owned the place. There were several shots being done at the same time and a lot of talent was bustling about both on and off the stage. A series of kudos and fist bumps came Angel’s way as he made his strut. When the star finished his drink he tossed it on the ground and some imp cleaned it up within seconds. Several actresses came up and slapped him right on the ass. “No drag play today hot stuff?”

“That’s next week toots,” Angel replied. His four arms got them back in kind. “Come on by and I’ll get you in as well. It’ll be magical.” The girls found it hilarious. Angel always offered. They laughed it off and left him to their business. In the world of porn the spider lived like a king.

“Angie,” another woman approached from behind. It was one of Valentino’s secretaries, a dragon of a woman with a giant mouth and angry titties. “Valentino wants to speak with you. Come by his office in fifteen.” She was about to walk out but swung her head back. “And put on some clothes too.”

“Boots are clothes aren’t they?” Angel grinned, but the secretary had as much humor as her boss. The life of a king was over. He redressed and went up to the boss’s room with all haste.

The door was closed when he came up. Another meeting was in effect so he waited outside, fervently  
texting on his phone.

“Looks like I ain’t coming tonight,” he texted. “Go on without me. Boss is about to pull some sort of shit on me.”

“Well ain’t that some shit,” Cherri replied. “I’ll head out without ya then.”

“Don’t party too hard without me.” Angel locked his phone and put it away. Whoever was having a meeting with Val was freaking about something. That something turned out to be a gun when said employee was blasted out the door with a few new holes in him.

“Take him to the morgue,” Valentino ordered, to which a trio of women complied. “He can get back to work after he’s learned his lesson. Now, I know you’re there Angie baby. Come inside.”

Angel scooted one step in and stood far away from Valentino’s desk. The man was a formidable sight, although it was his clothes that were doing the most of the talking. In truth he was an ant man, but his extravagant fur collared robe and heart shaped glasses distracted most from that fact. He kept two arms perched at his desk and two more underneath. Angel’s seen the trick plenty of times so he kept his distance, but the amount of guards around him made the point moot.

“You, uh, wanted to see me boss?” he asked.

“Yeah, I do.” the boss lit a pipe and took in a deep breath. “Got the raw footage from this afternoon. You’ve been slacking recently.”

“I’ve been what?” Angel cocked an eyebrow. “Boss, I don’t think I’ve been doing anything different.”

“You always say that.” He pulled his heart shaped glasses down and showed his red eyes. “You’ve been acting different since you disappeared a few weeks back. And my associates have told me you haven’t been staying at your suite.”

“Boss, I-.”

Val pointed him down. “I don’t like you staying at that shack down the street. That Princess is no good for you, and if you’ve been getting friendly with that Radio Demon I’m going to be very upset. You best stick to sleeping back here. I’m sure your little piggy has been very lonely.”

Angel took a step closer. Several guards took notice. “Don’t you dare pull Fat Nuggets into this you-.”

“Don’t start it.” Valentino’s grin curled into a malicious grimace. “That mouth of yours is what always gets you into trouble.”

“This mouth is what makes you money.”

“We’ll see about that.” Valentino rose from his chair. His goons readied themselves for a usual order.  
Angel was ready to curse his stupid mouth but the Overlord made no order. “That’ll be discussed later.  
There’s a man I want you to get for me.”

“Okay what kind of man?”

“A big man, a lug of muscle with an iron windpipe and penchant for electronic music. His name is Bassmaster.”

“Bass?” Angel asked. He almost laughed out of turn. “Not to make you sound retarded Val, but shouldn’t it be bass, you know, like the instrument?”

“Not according to him,” he replied with a helpful reminder to zip it. “I want you to bring him to me so  
that I can incorporate him under my empire.”

“His music is really that good?”

“Immensely. Hell’s new arrivals seem to like him and his growing demonic power is just what I’m looking for.”

“Alright, sounds easy enough.” Angel frowned. “What’s the catch?”

Valentino dropped the pipe and lit a fresh cigar in its place. “Let’s just say the last time someone offered him a contract he didn’t like the offer.” Valentino handed Angel a wallet and gold pimp cane with a red jewel in it. “Go to the Cemetery and wake him up. You can show him a good time afterwards and see if he wants another deal.”

Angel peeked inside the wallet and measured its thickness. The pimp cane was emitting a powerful aura as well. “Uh, you sure you want to let me handle all this? I mean I’m flattered but I’ve already got a few bad ideas swimming around.”

“That’s why I’m going too,” said an electronic voice. From behind a black demon with golden spiked hair and neon eyes presented herself in all her glory. “How’s it going web shitter?”

“Eugh, seriously you Synthia?” Angel sighed. “Boss, I can handle this on my own. I have some connections that’ll-.”

“I honestly don’t care what you think.” Valentino tsked. “Go find him, fuck him if you have to, and get him back here by tomorrow morning. After that, we’ll re-discuss your living arrangements. Synthia make sure you do your best as well. Thanks baby girl. You’re my favorite employee.”

“Of course Daddy,” she replied, the gap in her front teeth letting out a bit of static. The two were given their pats on the cheek and thrown the hell out. The second Angel was given breathing room he yanked out his phone and started texting.


	2. Two, no Three Tickets?

As the skies over Pentagram City faded into a darker and darker shade of red, Charlie finally relented and crashed halfway up the stairs. Her body slowly slid down as she let out a long whine. Everything was in shambles, mentally at least. The hotel was fine, as a dozen suspect but ultimately harmless patients were allowed their free time for the evening. They refrained from the world of vice and sidestepped into the lounge, the library and even the ballroom where they could relax and find something productive to do with their time, all under Charlie’s permission.

Alastor walked up to the exhausted lady and lifted her up bridal style. He had been supervising the struggles throughout the whole day and thoroughly enjoyed it. “My dear are you sure you don’t need any assistance?”

“No, I’m the best,” Charlie groaned with her eyes spinning in circles. “This is what I do best. I’m the-...I’m the best. Yeah…”

“I’m sure you are.” From his hand a pair of tickets popped into existence. “That’s why you deserve a relaxing evening. I have tickets tonight for The Wizard of Oz with thirty eight percent of the original cast, with real flying monkeys. It’ll be a riot! What do you say?”

“You have tickets to Oz?” Charlie perked up. She rummaged through her pockets and pulled out two tickets as well. “I bought two the minute they came out.” She gasped. “We have seats right next to each other. How amazing is that?”

“That is amazing!” He answered. “I knew you were a fan of the arts but I couldn’t imagine.”

“Yeah, well imagine,” Vaggie said. She stood at the top of the stairs with a short black dress and her hair tied up into an elaborate ponytail. “So why do you have two tickets Alastor?”

Charlie hopped out of Alastor’s arms and walked up the stairs. Alastor kept his grin on. “Unfortunately my original companion couldn’t make it today, but no matter. The show must go on, so why don’t we all go together?”

“Absolutely,” Charlie smiled. “But first, it’s time for me to dress in my finest as well.” She patted Vaggie on the cheek and bolted up the stairs while her friends were left with a load of tension between them.

Alastor cracked his neck. “What have I said before dearie? You’re never fully dressed without a smile.”

“You lay another hand on Charlie,” Vaggie took a step down, approaching Alastor’s level. “Then you’ll regret coming here tu culo con voz aspera.”


	3. A Bass in the Ass of Pentagram City

Down in the southern part of the pentagram between the two points, a portion of the city made contact with the blood sea and expanded out into a wide expansive bay. Said bay was filled with garbage that would rival mountains, a monument to thousands of years of demons all agreeing that this one place would be the area they’d drop their shit into. And drop into they did, as the entire sewer system wasrouted to this one spot, and dump trucks added to the piles. It looked like shit, it smelled like shit and there was in fact shit, but it was the one place where bodies came in all shapes and conditions.

The limousine rattled through the littered landscape with frightening speed. “Ugh, gross,” Synthia blurted, rolling up the windows. “It smells like ass here.”

“Oh really?” Angel leaned in. His face was red from his inhaler.. Said inhaler was packed to the brim with premium narcotics. “Guess there are benefits to not having a nose. No wonder Val trusts me to get the job done..”

“Trust? You? Mr. Mobster Man?” She got a laugh out of that, slurping a frappe with enough sugar to make a lesser demon comatose. It helped power her. “Val only asked you to come because we don’t know how Bassmaster swings. I’m the professional here. Sexual energy personified. You’re just some dumb brawn that thinks he looks good in a dress.”

“Says you.” Angel posed for her, proving her wrong. “I’ve got charisma in spades. Everyone loves me at work while everyone has to be paid to fuck your jittery ass.”

“At least I have an ass you flat piece of exoskeleton.” Synthia spread herself out on her side of the limousine to fight for dominance. The two stared down, each finding a worthy rival in the other. That or a total bitch, but neither weren’t sure which definition applied. “Besides, at least I’m good enough to live at my luxurious suite and be a good little girl. You? You’ve really been staying at that shitty hotel uptown?”

“Yeah it keeps me away from floozies like you.”

“You’re the one to talk.” Synthia slid over to Angel’s side of the limo and poked him. “To be honest I was happy to see you gone. It made me the top dog at the studio. All eyes are on me now, while your films are coming later and later. You may not believe it boy, but folks are losing faith in you. You’re getting soft, Angel Dust. Your days are numbered.”

Angel pushed her off. He’d heard that kind of crap before from all sorts of stars. Still, it left a niggling strand in him, one that he wasn’t able to pull out. There was only one course of action. “Well, maybe, but Bruce wasn’t getting soft with me bitch.”

At the entrance to the Cemetery, Cherri Bomb rested her motorcycle on the side of the road. Angel’s text redirected her to this location. As much as she was ready to party her old apprentice took precedent. “At least I don’t have a fucking nose.” She commented. Out from the entrance a couple of filth encrusted demons wobbled out in their birthday suits. One of them spotted the cyclops and approached.

“Hey, biker bitch,” he grumbled. “What year is it right now?”

“Year? What’s it to you?” Cherri answered. “When’d you go in?”

The demon cricked his back. “2014. That a long time?”

“That’s a long time.”

“Bah,” he waved her off. After awhile it’s hard to care anymore, so he wandered back toward the city until a limousine barreled right over him. The car screeched to a stop inches away from Cherri’s bike. The party had just arrived, and from the sounds inside it was off to a good start. 

The squid headed driver ran around to open the door. “Oh please!” Angel waved Synthia off. “Like you would know anything about using your teeth right?”

“At least I got all my teeth you snaggletoothed gold tipped twink,” she fired back. “Who cares about  
technique when the camera has to look down and see that gross mug?”

“The camera loves me and you know it toots.”

“Not at the 3/4 th angle it doesn’t.”

“Oh that is it darling. Who needs ya?” Angel spotted Cherri and gave her a five. “I got my best girl here to do the job with me. So you can leave this all to me.”

“Wow,” Cherri smiled. “You’re way more excited for this shit than what you sounded on the phone.”

“Of course I’m excited. Now hurry up before the powder wears off.”

Angel pushed Cherri along and the two made their way into the trash heap. “Oh what, you’re too scared to handle me?” Synthia snarked and laughed, then coughed. The rancid air was making her heave. “Oh Christ what was the boss thinking? This place sucks!”

“Sounds like your boss’s a dick,” Cherri shouted in the distance. “Not that you wouldn’t mind.”

“That’s my girl!” Angel laughed and strode on ahead.

The two made their way up the trash heaps to find a good vantage point. They looked over the vast array of scrap, waste and biomass scattered all over the landscape, soaked by the red water and swarmed by the worst hell flies one could imagine. In several scattered areas, pairs of demon appendages emerged, slowly pulling themselves over vast distances toward their center of mass. In one spot a slurry of waste had a demon head slowly regenerating while the head suffocated for every second of it. On one hand a good chunk of these souls would survive an angel extermination simply for being hard to find in the garbage. On the other hand, nobody said being at this state of composition was pleasant.

Angel found a flat surface and helped bring Cherri down. He opened up his wallet and hidden within the rows of bills was a piece of paper with ancient Latin words on them.

“You wanna run with this girl?” Angel asked, presenting the pimp cane.

“No way, you have some of Val’s power?” She took a long look at it. The stone within pulsed with an evil energy, a fraction of Valentino’s influence concentrated into a battery-like device. “What? You’re afraid you’ll explode or something?”

“Nah, I just don’t like the boss’s energy. It feels wrong. Y’know having him in me and shit?”

“Hey whatever power I can get.” She placed her hand on the pimp cane. Its energy coursed through the punk rocker. “Oooh it’s tingly. Oh yeah, that feels good. Aight, give me the name.”

“Yeah yeah. It’s Bassmaster. Don’t twist the name.”

The gathering of power ceased to let Cherri give a quick wheeze for that silliness. “Bassmaster? Alright! Alright. Let’s see if I remember how to do this.” She gasped for air while Angel displayed the spell. Old magic was tricky if one hadn’t had the years to put in the work. At best Cherri had studied an elementary amount, but the power still flowed. “Ignes inferni,” she started. Her old Italian accent popped up. “mihi exultant lusibus. afferte mihi Bassmaster anima et corpus meum. Ut animam suam adposuit tibi et mihi!”

The pimp cane glowed with a harsh orange as its energy released a beam of light into the sky. There it exploded into a mass of strands and hit the ground before slinking their way through thousands of tons of rubbish. Each one managed to extract small individual pieces of flesh. Not all of him were in perfect condition but the dark forces of the pimp cane gave them that extra bit of rejuvenation to make them anew. Every piece was ferried over to the center for a complete whole. As they kept forging the size of this creature was growing more and more apparent. It was starting to get terrifying. 

At long last the man’s head spun through the air and landed on top of his neck. The energy sealed him and lit a fire in him, revitalized him. With a burst of newfound power he slammed into the ground and the whole mountain shook under his impact. The gangsters were dead silent.

“Uh oh,” Cherri said. The pimp cane ran out of energy and crumbled into a pile of dust. It was as if it never existed. “Ain’t that a bitch Angie.”

The bass demon stood tall. He was built like a rectangle, bulked out on all ends and swinging his pride like it was nothing. “Ah, what a surprise,” he said with a deep resonating voice. “I am reborn. You dare awakens the bass?”

“Yep. That was us.” Angel stepped forward. Time to work his moves. “We were told you were a guy who knew how to party. Is that right?”

“Party? I invented partying.” The Bassmaster stomped his way up past Angel and slid all they way down with no effort. “Partying hadn’t truly been known until I mastered it in the year 2018. Now that I’ve returned it’s time to blow this town down with the might of sound.”

Angel and Cherri slid down beside him. “That’s the spirit baby, let’ go. I got a man who wants get you contracted up for a good deal. Maybe a full tour.”

“Bassmaster does not tour. Bassmaster plays and the concert comes to him.” the man pushed Angel to the side. “I do not need a producer to keep me down.”

Angel chased him through the valley toward the entrance. “C’mon, there’s so much free shit you can get, like say clothes. You’re looking pretty cold right now.” He pulled out the wallet. “Maybe a good time? My daddy gave me of spending money for you. So what would you like?”

“Heheheheh,” the Bassmaster vibrated. At least he respected the hustle. “I’m not taking any money from the likes of you. I only take orders from the fine ladies of the world.”

“What, do you not like my bust size?”

“It’s fluff.” He pounded his own chest. “Bassmaster knows when something has substance to it.”

Cherri stole the wallet and grabbed the bass demon by the arm, letting him get a good feel of her. “Alright then big guy, why don’t you come party with me? I’m a pretty wicked dancer and your ass is huge. I’d like to see that moving.”

“Bassmaster puts the bass in Big ass.” he laughed to himself, but Cherri brought him back to attention. He sized her up, checking out all of the proportions, her face. He frowned. “I don’t do with cyclops.”

Cherri was about to switch over to fight mode but Angel made the save. “Look, we’ll hook you up with a hundred broads across this city if you come with us.”

“No words. I have to see to believe it.” The bass demon grumbled. “If this is hell then I can only trust my eyes.”

Back at the limousine, Synthia was texting on her phone giving an update of the situation to Val. He simply replied that he didn’t care if the stench was bad. They had to do their job. As she was texting a small group of newly reformed demons gathered around the limousine. She glanced up and saw the lot of them eyeing her with vicious smiles. They were obviously excited.

“Hey lady,” one of them said. “Give us the car keys. We’ll take you on a wild ride.”

“Yeah we’ve been out of the game for too long. Time to make up for lost time.”

Synthia’s reaction, without looking up from her phone, was to point and zap the greasy boys up like Christmas lights. They were fried and bunt to a crisp in mere seconds. The talent of each sinner was different. Some were weak and worthless, while other sinners could match with the demons of Hell. She saw a giant brick wall coming her way and was about to waste him but when she saw Angel come around the corner, well. She still wanted to but was obligated not to.

“Geez is something cooking around here?” Angel quipped. “Cause I’m getting hungry. How about you big guy?”

“Oh I’m hungry alright.” The Bassmaster marched up to the demon pornstar at the car and put a finger under her chin. “Hey there baby. You’re the finest demon I’ve seen so far down here. E-lec-tri-fying. Are you free tonight?”

Synthia looked up at him, repulsed at almost every level. “Oh look at you,” she said, reaching out a hand to feel him out. “So intimidating. I like that. Why don’t we go somewhere fun? There’s plenty of wonderful places around here. I’m sure I can make it worth your while.” She hit a remote button in her hand and the roof folded up into the limousine. It was the only way to carry a demon this large.

“Yeah. That sounds good. I feel like this town needs to know that I’m here.” He eyed the towering skycrapers and neon signs in the distance. “Get me some clothes, and take me to the place where my debut will happen.”

“Great, I know the-.” She stopped and eyed Angel giving some kind of snark to Cherri. A devilish smile lit up on her face. “Perfect place for you. Do you need any equipment?”

“I do not need anything.” He struck a pose and an aura of magic came over him. For a newbie he was coming in at a high level. “Bassmaster is the equipment.”


	4. Alastor is a Narcissist

Razzle and Dazzle drove the trio up to the front of St. Alhambra's Theater right among the rows of honor socialites. Charlie emerged from the back dressed in a sharp red dress that she hadn’t worn in a long time. Alastor followed from behind and led her the way up the stairs while Vaggie got stuck in her seatbelt for some reason. She slumped in her seat. The two had been talking about musical theater for the past hour.

“I was wondering why there’re so many shows coming out right now,” Charlie said. “It’s quite a phase huh?”

“Yesiree,” Alastor smiled. He presented the fellow theater goers. Many famous actors and composers were making their meet and greet on the way up. “Look at these fiery individuals! So full of talent! I may have come here too early to witness the trend in the living world, but I’m happy to see entertainment evolve to these new heights down here.” He nudged Charlie with a wink. “Let’s hope the Sinners keep coming, eh Charlie?”

“Yeah, definitely,” Charlie put on a fake smile, not sure how to unpack the idea. This gave Alastor a snicker.

“Oh Charlie, you’re the ruler of these people aren’t you? That makes you the princess of show tunes! I’d take that as a compliment my dear.”

Vaggie caught up to them and the three went through the entrance. The crowd was an impressive bunch, a collection of sinners who managed to make some actual money with a few noble demons showing off their old wealth. Vaggie watched the two of them as they mingled through the big wigs. Most came up to the radio demon like an old friend, a veteran of the studio. Charlie had a mixed reaction from the crowd given her recent public debacle, but royalty was royalty and she was a charmer in these circumstances.

“Charlotte it’s a surprise to see you here,” said one of the nobles. She shook her hand. “And I didn’t know you were with the Radio Demon. What a turnabout.”

“We’re business partners,” Charlie corrected, although her words were hurt by Alastor’s hand reaching around her. “And just that.”

“Yes no need to harbor any unwanted rumors,” Alastor winked. His jesting sparked confusion in the noblewoman, and a lot of anger from Vaggie two feet away.

When seating was order the three took to the auditorium and landed smack dab in the middle of the crowd. Ideal column, ideal row. Vaggie offered the furthest seat for Charlie but she got distracted and took the center, letting Alastor take her right side. She took the left and took Charlie’s hand.

“Hey Charlie,” she said, keeping her voice down. “Aren’t you excited? This is going to be great.”

“Oh yeah I’m so excited!” Charlie squeaked over to her side. The two stared at each other for a good second.

“You know dear, I know enough gentlemen in this establishment to show you the backstage after.”

“Really? Vaggie that would be great!” She was back on the other side of the seat.

After a minute the lights dimmed and a skull faced demon brought up the introduction to the show before applause brought the horned actress out in her rough blue dress. The three sets of eyes diverted in three separate directions. Charlie, utterly enraptured, had elbows to knees in her seat as the first song began. Vaggie, unable to focus, kept her eyes on Alastor. And Alastor, shifting focus, had his eyes on the musical, on Charlie, and on the people in the balcony seats on the left. He recognized a couple of the Overlords sitting with their family and associates. A mental checklist went down Alastor’s mind.

Then, his eyes shifted over to the empty seat beside him. He let out a sigh. The night was going to get a little bit harder.


	5. Fuck it Let's Party!

The limousine parked at the Happy Hotel and the guests were allowed in after a quick shopping spree. Bassmaster hit the front door with fresh hellforged sneakers and a tracksuit that stretched to his odd proportions. Angel stirred in his seat, his eyes transfixed on the hotel. He had signed off on the bass demon to come to the hotel but there was a hint of guilt stirring inside him. He squashed it with more hard drugs. Synthia was right. The hotel was making him soft. Cherri parked next to him and poked him from behind.

“Are you getting worried Angie?” Cherri asked. “Didn’t see you as the type to worry about breaking a few rules.”

“What are you talking about?” Angel snapped back. “I’m having a great time right now.”

A ruckus was roaring in the bar when they all walked in. The dozen or so patients were letting loose after an entire day of good lessons and virtues. It was time to get back to sinning. Husk paid no mind to them at the bar and Niffty was doing her best to keep up with the mess. Angel Dust walked up almost impressed.

“What’s the big deal today?” Angel asked. “I thought you guys were supposed to keep it under wraps.”

“That bitch Charlie is out for tonight so we have free reign for tonight,” one of them explained. “Like seriously, there’s nothing fun to do in this place. It’s all books and pre-approved television. I gotta let loose man!”

“There’s a lack of fun here?” Bassmaster stomped forward, his weight shaking the hotel as he went. “I will put an end to this. Bring me the biggest room in this establishment.”

“Right this way baby,” Synthia gave a courteous smile, but then egged Angel to actually show the way. The two went side by side while Cherri and a couple of the patients followed curiously. “Lucky bastard. You knew the Princess wasn’t going to be here did you?”

“Oh yeah, I knew,” Angel lied, but he still put on a vindictive smile to piss her off. “Look at you, trying to get me in trouble, but now I’m getting the credit for using my house.”

“Like this is your fucking house.”

“You’re right,” Angel snickered. “You know what? Fuck this place. After I get all the credit for this I’m going back to my old pad. We’ll make this my sendoff.”

“Yeah, a party in Ol’ Lucy’s place?” Cherri eyed the decorations and paintings. “Actually, this place is kind of a wreck. Let’s trash it some more!”

The group entered the ballroom and presented the bass man to the far end. The lights were turned on with a warm orange glow and moonlight entered through the stories tall windows on the right side. Bassmaster halted everyone and stepped back.

“Yes, this space, this echo.” He outstretched his arms. “This is the perfect place for my return. I call the denizens of this city to gather around me and dance. The rhythm, the bass, come to me.” 

The man started vibrating. His very presence created and distorted a musical tune that took over the room. His hands glowed with neon blue and red lights that into flames. With magic he cracked open the floor to bring up a stage, a light show and two massive amplifiers to take up a good chunk of the room. A low hum took the room and the sound of static and microphones scratches added to it. Bassmaster took to his stage with a sinister grin on his face, and that was when everyone figured that they should back up to the other side of the ballroom.

“Oh I can feel it. I can feel it.” The Bassmaster found his mixing deck and took control. Its switches sparked with power from his strong magic. “The Bass has come. Let’s get this party started!”

He hit the play button and all of the windows in the ballroom shattered. Sound raged across the hotel and spread three square miles in every direction like a sound nuke. The rhythm shook the entire uptown block for a minute but once it settled in the soundtrack came in tune. The watchers in the ballroom held their ears screaming for just a moment until they became attuned or, rather, the music adjusted to their needs. After all this music wasn’t meant to blow people back, only to invite people in, and within minutes the hard bass and synth chords lured in the other hotel guests and hundred of demons into the ballroom.

“Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwww Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!” Bassmaster rapped. “My power’s infinite, but I need a quick minute, to make this sound definite and my love passionate. My soul is explicit and my virtue is forfeit so I hit it ‘til I win it and I become ultimate! I got the bass. I got the bass. I got the bass. I got the bass!” The man adjusted his lower levels to broaden his range. The hotel shook underneath his powerful wub. “Y’all can’t deny what I testify, that my music gets you high and you all multiply. But I can’t deny what I feel inside. This power’s alive and my coming is nigh. I got the bass! I got the bass! Come on!”


	6. He Can't be Trusted

The curtains fell over the theater and the crowd cheered for the cast of Oz. Charlie stood up with a full standing ovation and, not to be upstaged, Alastor joined her. The large demonic cast took their bow and the guests filed out of the theater.

“That. Was. Amazing!” Charlie was on a cloud nine of her own. Her feet could barely stay on the ground. “Vaggie, did you see the monkeys? And the Dorothy actress was so good! Special effects, dancing, cartoony violence! So great!”

“Pfft, well, it was alright,” Vaggie had her arms crossed. “It was really different from the movie I saw when I was alive. Very different.”

“Oh boo Vaggie. Show some love. It’s a date night isn’t it?” They made it back to the lobby and saw a few cliques forming together.

“You know, I still have that offer for meeting the actors,” Alastor tempted. “I do have some hands in making these productions happen.”

“Oh really?” Vaggie sighed. “Fine, show us the way you narcissistic bastard.”

“Ohoho dearie. That attitude doesn’t suit a lady like you.” Alastor laughed, but something caught his attention. Two well known demons were eyeing him and beckoning over, one an owl demon with glasses and the other a short girl with pigtails and a black and heart shaped dress. “Excuse me Charlie, but those fine fellows over there are friends of mine. Would you like to meet them?”

Charlie caught an eyeful of them. “Um, I think I’m good.” Charlie said. “I’m a bit tired so I’m ready to go home.”

Alastor shrugged his shoulders. It was worth a shot. “Very well. In that case I’ll take my time with them for now. Please, go on without me. I’ll be home soon.”

“Oh, are you sure?” Charlie was having second thoughts but Vaggie had her by the arm already. The two were out of the building in seconds.

“Yes, yes don’t worry. This is all business as usual for me. I hope you had a wonderful time! We should do this more often.” He waved them off before partaking in his chums. “Velvet, Stolas, my friends. I hope you put the meeting down in stone?”

Outside Vaggie kept dragging Charlie to the limo but she managed to break free. “Alright Vaggie, what’s up? You’re being very rude right now.”

“Rude? Rude!? He just ruined our entire date!” Vaggie fumed. “He took over the entire show and you lapped it up!”

Charlie was taken aback. “He was really into it like I was Vaggie. He was laughing and crying and cheering. It was like I finally got to know the guy, what he’s truly like on the inside.”

“But you know what is he is don’t you?” Vaggie pulled her in close, eye to eye. She made sure Charlie heard this loud and clear.. “Remember what I said before. He can’t be trusted. I mean think about it. Why would he say he has connections to this theater and then have to buy tickets in the main audience? Doesn’t that sound a little off?”

Charlie’s face went from incredulous to horrified. The high from good musical theater crashed and she was back to reality. “When you put it that way it does sound really bad..”

Vaggie let out a sigh of relief. “Look, he isn’t a run of the mill sinner like me or Angel. He’s an Overlord, and you’re a princess. He’s probably hoping to get on your good side so that he can get some political clout, maybe even get closer to your family.”

Charlie’s heart sank at the thought. “I see your point. Really, I do. In fact, starting now I should watch his every move. As much as I like him, we can’t prove he feels the same way.” 

“Right,” Vaggie’s eye drooped. The mood had deflated like a dead balloon.”This date was a travesty. C’mon, let’s get home before everyone starts raiding the bar.”

“Yeah, I’m worried about how the patients have been acting around Angel. But hey, what’s the worst that could happen?”


	7. Hazbin Party (GONE SEXUAL!)

The hotel was an uncontrollable riot. Scores of demons and sinners alike were packed into the room unable to contain the hypnotic powers of the bass. The bar was dry, the staff was being tossed from one end of the ballroom to the other, and the porn stars and the punk girl were destroying the place.

“Woo! Is it me or is it getting hot in here or is it just me?” Angel asked, his voice barely registering over the music. The man had took some molly that Cherri had brought along and stole the last of Husk’s booze. Anything to take him out of a rational stay of mind. “I don’t even know what the FUCK this music is!”

“Oh it’s lit isn’t it!” Synthia smirked. She couldn’t help but shake her hips. “I think Val’s on the right track with this one. This shit if fire! With this fatass as our main act we’ll control all of the media!” 

“Yeah, we’re gonna take over this city!” 

“We’re gonna fuck everyone over!” The two of them laughed and held each other side by side. Turned out that an overload of drugs and hypnotic suggestion could make anyone the best of friends. A bat landed between them.

“Batter up!” Cherri yelled before a vase came hurling their way. Angel picked up the bat by instinct and shattered it in one swing. Cherri barreled into them two seconds later. “You guys are such shit dancers. I oughta teach you some proper moves sister.”

“And I ought to teach you some of my moves girlie,” Synthia said with seduction dripping off her tongue. Cherri chuckled and tried to explain herself but the moment for unfortunate decisions was already here and Synthia had such electrifying hands. 

Angel rolled back for a more cinematic view, and what a view it was. It was a sublime party, but something was buggin him. Turned out to be a piece of porcelain lodged in his side. He pulled it out and focused in. There was a little Greek picture on the surface of a little girl with yellow hair. He kept staring at it. It reminded him of someone.

A moment of sobriety hit and Angel looked up. It was complete anarchy. The paintings were being torn off the walls by the dozens. The sinners snapped them in two as they danced. In the corner a fire broke out and someone was pushed in to put it out. And at the entrance some of the former patients tore off the door and surfed on the crowd, their middle fingers pointed to the hotel roof.

Angel lied on his back. The room was starting to spin.

“Angel? Angel? Angel!” Charlie yelled. When Angel came to it was the afternoon and Charlie was scolding him. “What is this here?” She held up a bag with white substance in it.

Angel shook his head. This wasn’t reality at all. “Uh, What about it?”

“I found this in your room when I was cleaning.” She tossed it into the trash. “Come on, it’s your first day here. You can’t start on the wrong foot.”

“Come on baby,” Angel leaned up. “I just got here, okay? I don’t know what’s on me right now. I don’t know what I’m doing. You can’t expect me to change just like that.”

“That may be true, but you gotta start somewhere. Please, this is very important to me.” This made Angel groan. Did she always have to be so serious? Still, the concern on her face. It was genuine, a little creepy for a denizen of hell to be honest, but it was there. She pulled out a pen and paper. “So, let’s do the treatment starting now. Tell me about your family life?”

Angel whipped back to reality. The music was rocking, and the vibrations still had their effect. but something else lit a fire in Angel and he pulled himself back up. “God fucking dammit.. Stupid bitch,” he swore under his breath and pulled out his Tommy gun. This made enough smart people back off and let him hit the center of the ballroom. The spider let off a few warning shots. “Hey bozo! Get off the stage!”

“I’m sorry what?” Bassmaster asked.

“I said!” The music cut out. “GET THE FUCK OUTTA THIS HOTEL!”

The whole crowd was dead silent, all staring at the drag queen yelling them down. A rustle came up from the entrance and two voices came through.

“What the hell happened here!?” Vaggie and Charlie yelled in unison. Charlie stepped up. “Who are you and what have you done to my hotel? I demand you to leave!”

“Are you the owner of this establishment?” Bassmaster asked. “Do you deny my true calling? Do you not hear it? The power of Bassmaster?” 

A reply came in as a hail of bullets made a line across his chest. Angel’s gun was smoking. “You heard the lady. Our business is through.”

The two girls backed up Angel and took to a stance. “If anyone wants a new asshole you can stick around,” Vaggie snarled with weapon in hand. “If not, you have 30 seconds to get out.”

The crowd stared back at Bassmaster. He was motionless after he got hit, but after a few seconds a vibration penetrated the air. The bullets in him shook and rattled out of him, and like magic he was like new again. “Hahaha! You thought you could kill the bass again? This was my warm up. Let me show you the true power of the bass! The carnal instinct of demons shall be unleashed!” The amps were reconnected and a new record was put on the turnstile.

“Well it was good while it lasted,” Synthia marched up with Cherri being dragged by the hair. Her fingers were ready to shoot. “Looks like you’re as stupid as I orignally thought. I’ll make sure the tell the boss how much of an idiot you were before I sent you to the Cemetery.” 

She was about to burn down the entire hotel but her spark was drowned out by the power of sound. Bassmaster rolled up a keyboard and placed his finger on one note. “The bass requests your voice crowd. I want to hear you scream for E. E, for Entertainment, E for erotic, E for Electronic!” He pressed the key and a sensual wave hit the whole crowd, blowing away at their senses and leaving a hypnotic effect with its cadence.

Synthia clutched her head at first, but then grabbed her body. “Oh,” she moaned. “Okay, this is what Val was truly after.” She hit the ground panting on all fours, unable to take the heightening of her body temperature. Unfortunately the others around her were feeling the same thing with drool coming out of their mouths and grubby filthy hands clawing towards the nearest person. Behold the grossest possible: a giant wave of sinners and demons way hornier than they should ever be. 

“Hey, get back! Get back!” She kept trying to shoot but she was out of energy. Her hands were sweaty and clammy. “Shit shit shit shit shit shit god motherfucking dammit! Take this bitch instead.” Synthia threw Cherri into the crowd and she disappeared under the mass of people, but more of the crowd kept coming. The swearing continued. 

Over on Angel’s side the spider covered for Vaggie and Charlie as the space they had to themselves was closing in with misbehaving monsters. 

“Charlie, are you alright?” Vaggie shook Charlie. The girl was closing in on herself, trying to hold back as much as possible. It was getting to her too. “Stay with me Charlie. Don’t give in. Charlie!”

“Alright girls stay behind me.” Angel assured. “Everything’s going to be fine.” The crowd started to close in with some of the men catching an eye on the two wonderfully dressed girl just waiting for it. Angel pulled out more guns and threatened anyone who got close. “Cherri! Get a bomb rolling and let’s get outta here!” There was no response. “Oh shit.” Angel blew back a few gents with the Tommy guns but it did not affect the mood at all. The ammo dried up fast. 

“What are you doing?” Vaggie hissed. Her entire face was glowing red. “We need to get out of here.”

“This guy’s set for miles. There’s no running from this gig.” A girl latched onto Angel’s waist and got very intimate before a bat bonked her unconscious. “I’m running out of options here.”

“Well you’re the porn star here. You know how this goes.”

A lightbulb went of in his head. “You’re right.” Angel stood proud. Game face time. “I was born for this exact moment. Alright everyone get into position. We’re gonna make a mess out of ourselves!”

For Angel the solution was a few simple steps. Step 1: He stole a beret from one of the more bourgeois dancers. Step 2: He organized. Most of the demons were trying to pull back their instincts and fight but they were moving to more drastic measures. The answer was to direct the fucking, so he took charge and organized group by group, couple by couple. People smooshed together in an intoxicated love that would only ever last under these circumstances, the perfect porn setup from Hell. Now with proper direction they went with it and became preoccupied. Step 3: He kept them preoccupied.

“Alright you two I wanna see doggy style but with your legs forward like this. No like this!” Angel demonstrated for them. “Yeah that’s good. You girls, you’re wasting potential. What? You’re afraid of some razor sharp teeth in your cootch? Amateurs. Watch them and work those jaw muscles.”

The circle stopped shrinking and the hotel gals were safe from the intruders. Just the intruders though. 

“Um, honey?” Vaggie asked. “Are you feeling alright?”

“Oh I’m feeling wonderful.” Charlie turned around. A pair of horns sprung from her head. “Don’t you feel wonderful Vaggie?”

“Yeah,” Vaggie’s concern had shifted. Her hands shook while she pointed. “Um, you got some, uh. Charlie, your horns, they-.” 

At this point Charlie stopped listening. She crawled over her on all fours, forcing her legs open and pushing her on her back. Charlie giggled as she pressed down on her. “Vaggie,” she hushed with a tone that had rarely come out of her before. “When was the last time we’ve been this, intimate?”

Vaggie gulped. “Well, it’s been awhile, but this isn’t really, it-...it’s not.” She fell back. A kiss was all that was needed to seal the deal.

“Oh would you look at that,” Angel remarked, looking behind his shoulder. Another thing behind his back was an explosion, and a half naked Cherri Bomb stumbled out from the scores of falling dudes. “Hey sugar tits, how’s the party going.”

“Oh it’s explosive alright.” Cherri groaned. She eyed the show going on between Charlie and Vaggie as she walked by. “That’s pretty hot.”

“The only thing that’s truly hot is my beat,” Bassmaster announced over the microphone. Despite all of Angel’s hard work there were thirty or so demons without a tango partner. “So what will it be? Death? Or partying?”

Cherri and Angel looked at each other. “Mind if we pick and choose?”


	8. Battle of the Bands: Merry Melodies vs Wubtastic

It took about two hours for Alastor to get home. The diplomatic talks took so long that Stolas offered the deer demon a ride, and he couldn’t really refuse. The three Overlords were booked in the back continuing their negotiations. Stolas, an original Prince of Hell, hosted them at a third of his usual size in order to fit in with his smaller guests. Meanwhile Velvet recorded the entire happenings between them at a constant pace. As the ruler of Wonderland visual proof was a constant need for reassurance. When they reached the perimeter of the Hotel they could hear the deep throbbing of the music.

“It sounds like you live with good company Alastor,” Stolas quipped. “You ought to invite us over if such festivities are happening.”

“What if he’s already inside?” Velvet rolled down the window to get a better listen. “Being in two places at once? I’m like that sometimes, I think?”

“It sounds kinky in there.” The bird’s beak was already covered in drool. “Yes you are a worthy member of our association.”

“Well I’m sure my fellow friends are having a wonderful time,” Alastor laughed it off. “But, this sounds like a problem. I’ll go in and see to the tunes. It’s been a pleasure, as always.”

“If I remember I’ll go visit Rosie,” Velvet waved him off. “Hope she’ll be feeling better.”

“Yes, of course.” Alastor went through the front door and made his way into the ballroom. Now, for decades he had entertained a league of strange and hedonistic folk. However, his usual calm took a heavy blow upon viewing the place. The landscape was various shades of red and white. The sounds of moans and screams wormed into his ears. The stench was as one would expect, putrid. The images he took into his soul were indescribable and barely even drawable. But he did see Bassmaster, still playing with the same momentum as when he started. The hulk returned the stare. The sight of a man not falling for his hypnotic beat was just as scarring.

“What do you think you’re doing old man?” he asked in his booming voice. “Do you not hear the power of this beat?”

“Yes indeedy good sir,” Alastor replied. “And I must say I love your passion even if your music is, how shall I say it, vulgar?”

“You say that now, but soon you will understand the beat. You will feel its freeing energy, and you will dance until you’re dead. This is what Bassmaster has decreed.”

“Ohoho. That’s not possible my dear friend.” Alastor snapped his fingers, and the hotel shifted to his tune. A pair of dials clicked in his eyes. “The only one having any chance of dying today is you.” 

For a second the room distorted under Alastor’s terrifying influence, but Bassmaster stood his ground and hit him with a wub. Like a brass counterattack a wave of jazz music drowned out the sound of the EDM and hit the man, but he held his ground and pumped up the volume. The wubs and kicks pulsed across the hotel, silencing the brass beat by beat. Alastor countered with heavier treble and string instruments and then, with a twist of fate, the jazz matched with the rhythm to compliment it, make it flow well, but it was all under Alastor’s will.

Bassmaster shot some lyrics to change the tune. “You thought for a moment that you would get on it, but you only try to defy my incoming enthronement!”

The sound started to fit toward the Bassmaster’s vision but Alastor rolled around with his vocal queue. “You barge in and pretend to be the king, but how can be when you have no swing?” Alastor marched up to the stage. “You see I’m the true offspring of Broadway and Duke Elling, and you can’t deny my passion when I sing!”

The shift in the music back into Alastor’s favor and soon was overpowering the rap. Bassmaster’s setup had its limits, but Alastor’s legion of players pushed past their limits and started tearing away at the stage. With one last blare of their horns the amplifiers burst into flames and the mixing deck was torn back. The stage exploded and Bassmaster was blown to pieces..

“My music...is….eternal...” His voice echoed away into nothing.

When the music stopped the crowd broke away from it stupor. Various demons came back to reality and were greeted by the partners that they had enjoyed a wonderful night with. Awkward silence and coughing ensued. Without music everyone seemed less attractive.

“Uh, Vaggie,” Charlie said. She had returned to her normal form, but was now sporting a redness harsher than any imp. “Vaggie snap out of it. We’re in trouble.”

Vaggie groaned. It was as if everything was a dream and Charlie was some hallucination trying to ruin her shuddering afterglow. She leaned up nonetheless and hung on to Charlie. “What is it hon? What are you talking about...oh shit.” The two covered themselves in shame. Hundreds of people were staring, though they had no place to judge given they were in the same spot. A pair of robes popped over them and helped them out.

“Now now, that’s not very ladylike of you two,” Alastor stated, approaching with his eyes clothes. “The same goes for all of you too.”

“Yeah, party’s over,” Angel added, standing tall and proud but completely crusted over from all of the fluids. His fur was gelled everywhere. “Everyone scram before the Radio Demon gets you.” 

This threat prompted enough people to dive out of the hotel by the hundreds. Demons filed out of the ballroom and out the front door where Husk, more defeated than he had ever looked, led them out. A small imp blew him a kiss on the way out and he gagged. Niffty watched from the stairs, seemingly untouched from the whole experience with a shallow frown on her face. 

Cherri and Angel stood over the chunky remains of Bassmaster and blinked. “So does this mean you’re gonna be in trouble?” Cherri asked. “I’m sure he wasn’t brought back for a one night show.”

“Eh, doesn’t matter now,” Angel said, but then realized it did. “Hey Al, can you fix him up?”

“No need, I’m already prepared.” Voodoo symbols surrounded the deer demon as an energy shot up from the remains into Alastar. He pulled in Bassmaster’s severed arm and shook it before he was reassembled. It was a binding contract with presumed but not expressed consent. 

When the energy dissipated Bassmaster was brought to his knees. Alastor stood over him. “My good sir your soul has a lot of backbone to it. I hope you’ll provide backup music for me once in awhile.” 

“The Bass...” he groaned. “The Bass will...will never...screw it. I’m tired.” He pulled himself back up. This was the way of Hell after all. Back near a pile of crispy bodies an exhausted and infuriated Synthia dragged herself across the floor ready to snuff out an annoying pest when Bassmaster blocked her path. 

“Out of the way fatass.” She snarled. “I outta blow you away for what you’ve done to me. Do you know who I am?”

“No, but Bassmaster understands this world a little more,” he said. “To know that people other than Valentino are out there is informative. Come, I wish to see your boss.” He picked her up and stomped out the door. Synthia collapsed in his arms. At the least, she’ll get the credit for bringing him in.


	9. Afterglow

The next day Angel had a list of chores prepared for him. Alastor had fixed the reception room and some of the hallways but left the ballroom for Angel to handle. A request from the head of staff.

“I can’t believe you let that creep into the hotel,” Vaggie grumbled. “And don’t think that we’re going to pay for this too.”

“I swear Angel,” Charlie said, handing him another bottle of adhesive. “I thought you were actually try to be good for me.”

“I was! Didn’t you see me being heroic and shit. I thought about you a lot at that moment.”

“According to Niffty you broke a priceless vase and then rolled over it.” Vaggie had visual proof too. “You were probably waiting for the right moment to look cool. Putos hombres.

“Still, thanks for thinking about me.” Charlie gave a warm smile. Angel was about to return it but the scolding had to go on. “But you’ve overstayed your treatment. If you want to keep staying you’re gonna have to help around the place

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” Angel grumbled back. He reapplied the wallpaper at the back of the ballroom. “See if I ever help you two again.”

Cherri came back in with a box in hand. “Hey I dropped by your studio. Look who I found.” A little red pig popped out of the box. Angel dropped everything.

“Fat Nuggets my little sweetie!” the spider picked him up. “Mean ol’ Val didn’t do anything to you did he? Oh you little humble bumble you.”

“Well nobody said you were fired so looks like you’re still indebted.” Cherri leaned on the wall, trying not to look at Vaggie. No responsibility for her.

“Aw who cares about that when my little piggy is here?” Angel continued to baby the little teacup pig and as more people came in they did the same thing. No work got done that day as everyone became distracted by the pig.

Back at XXX Porno Studios, Valentino sat at his desk with a phone in one hand and a pistol in the other. “What do you mean our negotiations with Stolas broke down?”

“Apparently he’s been talking to other parties and is choosing a side,” Vox replied from his estate. “Velvet looks to be double dealing as well. Alastor must’ve made contact with them at some point.”

“That little bitch,” Val snarled. “That’s the last time we protect her. Still, I have my man in place. He’s very talented.”

“Yes I heard. Is Synthia doing well?”

“Yes of course. A little bit of forceful play won’t bring baby girl down that easily.”

“Good. I’ll be visiting Belial in a couple of days. The current alliance should be sufficient but I want some muscle for next month. It looks like we’re going to have heavier than expected resistance.”

“We’ll see how their influence actually pans out.”

“You control the vertical. I control the horizontal.” Vox swung around in his office chair and turned on the tv to watch the new. A sensational news story was going on about an orgy at the Happy Hotel with scandalous nudes of the Princess of Hell. “That reminds me. I need to get in contact with that inventor. See if he’s interested in a show idea I have.”


End file.
